Monday, 24 March 2014

Day One - Shaking Legs and Sweaty Hair

I hate exercise. I mean, I hate the process of getting yourself motivated to actually move, then having to go through the pain and torture itself. The feeling after you've finished and the painful stretching later is amazing, but people fail to note that you actually have to move around like a lummox for at least twenty minutes to achieve this. I am not graceful, I am not fit, I am not even thin, so I went in search of that feeling and the ability to at least feel slightly more comfortable in anything less than a jumper four sizes too big, I'm going to exercise and "eat clean", whatever that means.

The majority of my exercise will come from the amazing, mostly because I enjoy resistance training much more than cardio. I was actually had a test to determine my genetic levels of fitness, and I came out as a "medium-low" responder to cardio exercise, which explains why I hate it and never really see any improvements. I will (reluctantly) be throwing some running/cycling/squash in there - I have a gym membership which is sorely underused.

The plan for this week is to do about an hour of lower body, then upper body, then abdominals and cardio, then repeat this. Sunday is 90 minutes of total body torture. That brings us to today...MONDAY! I actually had a doctor's appointment today where I totally forgot to ask any of the questions I wanted, so I had an hour less of work than usual which might be where the energy has come from. Predictably, I put off doing my lower body workout until the very last minute (I think I started it at midnight...) and spent the whole time wanting to give up. I didn't.

The routine was:
Legs on Fire
12 minutes of moderate intensity leg work. I have to say, I actually enjoyed doing the first move (a form of side squat lunge), which is an improvement on the past 24 years of my life.
Butt on Fire
Despite the sexual health clinic name, this is a brilliant workout, although it is sadly missing my favourite move, the pelvic thrust.
Call Me Maybe Mighty Squat Challenge
Perfect Legs Workout
Oh God.
Inner Thigh Clarity
This is where I started to really, really hurt. My inner thighs were shaking like badly made blancmange.
Bubble Butt (Clenching My Booty) - POP Pilates for Beginners
This is apparently a beginners video. It made me cry tears of sweat.
Roar Challenge for Abs and Inner Thighs
At this point, I had lost the will to live. I am already starting to regret a commitment of an hour a day, but I actually spent a whole twenty minutes making a spreadsheet, so I can't exactly turn back now.

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